God's Got It

11. What Makes a Godly Friendship?

Molly Rasanen & Jenn Maroney

Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.

0:00 | 1:11:39

What makes a godly friendship… actually godly?

In this episode of God’s Got It, Molly and Jenn have a real, honest conversation about the beauty, complexity, and healing power of friendship. They explore what it means to build faith-filled, soul-nourishing friendships that draw you closer to God instead of keeping you stuck in old versions of yourself.

They talk about friendship wounds, fear of being hurt again, people pleasing, vulnerability, gossip, mutual encouragement, and how to discern whether a friendship is meant to be nurtured, reworked, or released. This episode is a powerful reminder that healthy friendship isn’t about surface-level connection or staying agreeable just to keep the peace. It’s about honesty, intention, care, and allowing God to lead the relationships in your life.

If you’ve been craving deeper community, healing from relational hurt, or longing for more authentic God centered friendships, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

If this episode spoke to you, be sure to share it with a friend and send us a message — we’d love to hear what landed.

And if you’re ready to dive deeper into cultivating some God centered friendships come check out the Living Liberated Community!

____________________________________________________________

A faith-rooted space for women devoted to healing, embodiment, and walking with God in real life — together. Join the Living Liberated Community here. & donate here


An immersive, faith-centered somatic healing retreat designed to pull you out of survival mode and back into embodied freedom, devotion, and deep connection. Click here for more details about our upcoming retreat in Costa Rica! 


Let's Connect! 


SPEAKER_00

Welcome to God's Got It, the podcast for women coming home to God. I'm Jen, and I'm Molly, and we're just two girls walking with God doing our best to create the process. Here we'll be talking all things faith, healing, and what it looks like to build a life in Christ as we navigate the messy middle of being human.

SPEAKER_04

This is a space for the raw and unfiltered conversation. It's about seasons that test your trust, moments that stretch your faith, and stories that remind you, no matter what's unfolding, God's got it. What is up, everyone? Welcome back to the God's Got It podcast. Okay, another gathering with my favorite human, Ms. Molly. How are you doing today, girlfriend?

SPEAKER_01

I'm I'm tired, but I'm grateful. Like we were saying right before we got on here, it's just so crazy how easy it can be for us to get caught up in the like busyness of every day. But then every time we get on this podcast or every time we have one of our community calls, to take that moment to pause and be like, oh my God, this gets to be a part of my life. Like this gets to be my Tuesday, is sitting here and talking to you about God so that we can bring more people home to God.

SPEAKER_03

Like, what a better life and mission and purpose than that. So I'm grateful. I'm grateful. How are you doing?

SPEAKER_04

Oh good. Good. I've got a bunch of travel getting ready to come up. Um, I have a life insurance uh conference to go to next week, so I'll be traveling for that a bit, and then of course our Costa Rica retreat is coming up right after that, and I'm gonna stay a little longer and do some exploring. So I'm just I'm going into a little bit of a busy run here for the rest of the month, but it's all good things. And just like you're saying, you know, just being able to weigh that out of like, yeah, it's busy, but man, what a life. Like I'm getting to travel to these different places and my business is still running and I'm able to still work. Like, what a time. What a time to be alive.

SPEAKER_01

I think that that's such a I know that we talk about like God and business a lot, but I think it's because it's such a cornerstone of both of our lives. I mean, we run a business together based on God, so of course that's gonna be a topic of conversation a lot. I mean, that's not what we're getting into today, but it's so it's such a gift from God that I'm so grateful for over and over and over again. The recognition of the reality that He has given us this creative power, right? He has given us the sovereign free choice to decide what it is that we want to do with our lives. And when we decide to pair that with his will for our lives, we just get to experience so much beauty. Like, I think sometimes people think about surrender to God being like, oh, I'm gonna live this like boring, mediocre, mundane life, and um that like his will for my life is gonna be so different than what I want for my life, and I'm gonna have to give up all of my fun, right? And meanwhile, like since I have fully surrendered into him, it's like everything that I had in mind for my life amplified even better. And I'm just so, so continuously grateful as much as entrepreneurship can be this place where we are struggling and stressing and worried about how everything's going to work out. When you bring God into the center of it, there's these like day-to-day moment-to-moment experiences where you're like, oh yeah, like I'm just the vessel for this thing and everything's gonna work out, and he's working everything out in my highest good, and almost this return of excitement of like, I just get to experience whatever it is that unfolds. And that's how I feel every time we're getting ready to go on one of these retreat trips of just like, I can't wait to see like what he has in store for this because we realize through our last retreat how God guided those spaces are. Like, we have no control over who signs up, who's coming together, why they're coming together, how they're gonna be connected, what sort of things they're going to trigger and inspire in one another, and what's gonna actually unfold inside of those spaces. And it's always such a beautiful adventure and also synchronicity. Like, so many things happen inside of that space that it's like, oh God, got what you did there. I see what's happening here. Like, you're really good. You're really good at what you do. So I'm just gonna let you keep doing it.

SPEAKER_04

Yes, I thought you were gonna say you were really grateful for me, but it's cool. All the other stuff is fine too.

SPEAKER_03

I'm also really grateful for you.

SPEAKER_04

I'm also really grateful for you. Question, Molly, were you wearing your friendship bracelet tonight? Um should I go put it on? I feel like I'm no, it's too late.

SPEAKER_01

I'm already smelling at the friendship podcast. Didn't say she was grateful for me. Didn't wear her friendship bracelet.

SPEAKER_04

What is life? And we're talking about friendships today. No, actually, I it's funny because I wanted we are gonna lean into talking about friendship today, by the way. Anybody from studio. But when we were in um when we were on our last retreat, I got these friendship bracelets for Molly and I. So I um thought that that was a way very grown up of me. Like, hey, we're friends and we're in business, we need friendship bracelets. And I lost it like a week ago. I was like, oh my gosh, I can't find my friendship bracelet, and Molly's gonna be so mad weird. And when she sees me, she's gonna have hers on and I'm gonna have to explain why I don't have it. And do you know that on Saturday when I was at my studio space working, I happened to look down at the floor and it was like beautifully laid out in camo on my carpet, and it was, and I was so excited. I was like, praise God, I didn't lose my friendship bracelet. You know, because I mean, a friendship bracelet is an important part of our partnership, right? It's like the outward symbol we are in this together, so I'm glad that I found it. And it's okay you don't have yours on. I just wanted to use it as like a funny intro into our today and talking about friendship. I'm trying to see mine from here.

SPEAKER_01

No, I'm pretty positive. Yep, yep, yep. It's safely hanging on my jewelry rack where it's meant to be, not lost or misplaced.

SPEAKER_04

Okay, fair. Thank goodness. Yeah, thank goodness. And lesson to me, I've got to leave. I take, I sometimes will wear like bracelets and stuff when I go to work, and I don't know why, because I immediately, when I get there, I have to take them all off because I'm working on people's body and I don't want them to be irritating for them. So lesson learned. I'll leave my friendship bracelet at home. Um, but yeah, I think Molly and I often reflect on how we came to be from, you know, we were in mentorship together to then deciding, like, hey, we're gonna host a retreat, and then hey, let's turn both of our businesses down and rebuild, you know, together with God at the center. And um I thought that was like a really important topic for us to lean into godly friendships and like I think friendships play such a powerful role in our lives, um in general. And I think the people that we surround ourselves with, they really shape us. And I was listening to a podcast the other day, it was talked about the same thing, right? Like the people that are in your circle, um, you know, they dictate around how we show up, how we speak, how we even see ourselves. And so, like, I used to really bother me when people would say this, but not all friendships are created equally. And I think it's important for us to maybe just lean in and talk about that a little bit.

SPEAKER_01

And to navigate the reality of both sides of that. Like, of course, we're going to use the beauty of this friendship as an example of the way that God guides people together and helps people shape one another through friendship, but then also the opposite side of that coin and how I don't want to call it, I guess we would call it like an ungodly friendship, right? Like the opposite of a godly friendship. That sounds a little aggressive. But friendships where I don't know, I think specifically as women, I think we grow up maybe learning a little bit of like a distortion of what friendship really is, especially in our younger, more formative years, like middle school and high school. You can have some really beautiful friendships, but then there's a lot of like sisterhood wounding and that sort of thing that goes on. And I think that it can distort and warp the reality of what friendship is really meant to be for us. And we spend so much time talking about and focusing on partnership and how formative and um transformational, like romantic partnership can be, when friendships can be just as massive and almost should be just as important alongside those romantic relationships because they can be just as transformational. They can be just as impactful. And I have this conversation a lot with women as a just a life coach around your romantic relationship, shouldn't be the only relationship that you're placing your focus on. Of course, there's seasons of life where yes, your husband and your children are the most important thing, but I think it's also really beautiful and fulfilling and creates a more holistic reality when we do have one to a handful of really good, rooted, godly friends that we can turn to for anything and everything, because it's a different relationship than romantic partnership. And it provides and satiates a different aspect of ourselves. And again, I think I know that we have men that listen to this podcast, but specifically as women, there's this really deep nurturing reality when women are connected to other women in a way that is propping each other up and holding each other accountable and pushing each other to grow instead of yanking each other back and being in that kind of old competitive way of being with one another.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, or even just the friends that, you know, as you're growing in your faith, I think there are those friends that still want to keep you in old versions of yourself, right? Like they maybe you have the good time friends that you always went out and partied with. I know I have a handful of those. And once I kind of shifted gears and I'm not really drinking anymore, I'm not hanging out in those spaces anymore, those friends are no longer. Or could because I would notice that whenever I would spend time with those people, that's the same activities that I would continue to engage in, you know. And it's like like we continue to normalize things that in our life that aren't good for us, you know, and keep us in those past versions. And I think it's yeah, I think there's a season that we all walk through where God is trying to um get us back in alignment and find people that are going to that be that alignment for us and like pointing us in the direction of who we desire to be. As you were speaking on those friendships, I couldn't help but get a little bit sad because when I assess my own life, I know that having um so hard to admit, but I don't have a ton of real solid friendships in my life. And I've always told myself that um, you know, I only need like one or two people, like I don't need a whole squad. And I'm not saying I I need a squad, but I definitely noticed that this is an area of my life where I'm really scared. And um, God is working on me. Like I've been kind of looking at trying to join maybe like these women's groups at my church or something, but trying to put myself back out there um to find friends. I know that sounds really crazy, so let me break that down. Like, I feel like I have always been the kind of person that had friends, everybody was my friend, right? People know me. Um, I was always the life of the party. Like, come hang out with me, let's go get a drink, let's go to dinner, let's do this thing. And I was always very sociable. Um, and what I came to be true for me is that when I started going through really hard times when I no longer had excesses of funds to spend to like to bankroll the parties or whatever was happening, um, just wasn't on the move like that. And I was going through some of the darkest moments of my life where everything was being stripped away. All of those friends were no more. Um, when I started going through hard times, people who were my friends, I'm putting friends in air quotes for not one. Friends. Yeah. Okay, good. Friends. Um, you know, who just raked me all over social media when I was going through some of my legal stuff, like commenting on um newspaper articles that said things about me. And these are people like from my sorority, people that I spent a good bit of my life with just ripping me to shreds. She should be taken out of our book that she was ever a member of this sorority, how disgusting, you know, like just ripping apart who I was as a human being because my mistakes happen to be publicly put on display for everyone to judge. And you know, that's that's my own fault. I'm not taking that, but you know, people who've stood by you and it's like sisters for life, friends for life. Um, so I have this just like deep, deep, deep wounding and fear around allowing people in. So I very rarely now will say, Yeah, that person's my friend. Um, you know, uh, it takes a lot for me to uh to step out in that anymore. And it makes me sad. And I and you know, I have a dear friend that I've been friends with for over 20 some years, and she's always she lives in another state, and she's always like, You need to get out there, you need to, you know, it's it's good for you to have friends and females to hang out with. And I get, but gosh, this feeling that I get in my system, it's so overwhelming and hard for me. Um yeah, so that's kind of where I am at this season as we're leaning into this topic. I know it's unnecessary for me, and I can hear you on all the importance of it. And gosh, it's just terrifying to me. Um yeah, it's terrifying for me to like, I guess, let that wall down and lean into what that could look like to have these friendships again. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Thank you for sharing all of that. And it's it's powerful to name because that's a perfect example of what I was speaking about, right? Like friendships that aren't really friendships, friendships that are transactional or they are experiential, that they're not actually invested and rooted in you, the person. They're rooted in you, the experience that you can offer, or you, the time in their life that they're at, right? Um, and I think that a lot of people probably have experiences with friendships like that that are flaky, that are fair weather, that aren't actually there when, let's be honest, shit hits the fan and life gets dark and aren't um, for lack of a better term, like ride or die, you know? And I think when you have an experience like you just named, of course, like that colors the reality of how you're going to relate to friendships of how am I going to feel safe enough to let anybody in in that way and actually know friendship when I thought that that was friendship and look what it did to me. Like I thought that I had these friends, I thought that I had these people in my life who would have my back. And in a time in my life when I needed them to have my back the most, they were gone. Right. So, of course, that's gonna break your trust inside, inside of friendship. Um, and it's so interesting because I have a very different experience as far as friendship. Like I've I've always had a lot of good friends, a lot of like from the beginning to the end friends. And I I've had friends that have come and gone in seasons that we've moved through where again, maybe they were just college friends or just friends because of what is what is that called? Like circumstantial, right? Like we have the same job and we're the same age. So now we're friends instead of like we are actually similar in mind and value system. And I think that that's something that we we can get into. Kind of like, how do you, how do you know the difference between somebody who's really there for you to be there with you through the ins and outs of life, the ups, the downs versus yeah, people who are just there because of circumstance. And how do you actually come back after something like that into a state of trust with the people you do meet in your life that they aren't going to turn around and do something like that to you? And I think so many women in their own way, so many people in their own way, I'm sure, can relate to that. And I think about being in your mid-30s to early 40s, and I've had so many friends talk about this where it's like, okay, we're we now have partners and we're we're settled down, right? Many of us are married, and it's like now I feel like I have to go through the awkwardness of dating all over again because I need to find friends. It's like I need to go on the dating apps to find women my age and my area that want to do life together. And it's such an interesting season to be in because when we're younger, our friends do become our friends because they're circumstantial, right? We go to the same school, we're in the same, we're the same age, we have the same teacher, or we play on the same sports team, or you go to the same college, you're in the same major, that sort of thing. It's like there's a lot of these circumstances that create friendship. And I'm even thinking about this right now for you and I, and I think a lot of our audience as well, um, who are entrepreneurs and we're building this life of freedom and we're working from home, it can get really lonely. Like you don't even have the circumstance of a workplace to find friendship anymore. So, how do you, yeah, how do you go about doing that? And how do you know once you have met somebody, whether or not that is going to be what we're gonna call a godly friendship, which is a friendship that is really there, like really there, really willing to be in all of life with you and not just ride the good times and run away when things get sticky or messy or dark in your life.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

Well, as I'm reflecting on a few of the friendships that I do have and deeply cherish, I I think it's the people who check in with me, and it's it's less of just the simple hey, how are you? Okay, and I don't really care what the answer is, you know, but no, really. And they remember things that I have shared with them and they're like, hey, this kind of came through for me, and they just take the time. I think for me, it's like a taking of the time to dig deeper underneath of my unfine. Um, because I wear that mask a lot. It's very hard for me to take it off. I feel this um burden I've placed on myself that I have to show up a certain way. I have to um be the one who brings the happy and keeps everyone uplifted. And so for me, a godly friendship are the people that I really cherish are the people who see beneath that and not challenge me, but care enough to say, yeah, I'm not buying that, or like dig a little deeper to get me to say what I'm not saying, what's underneath of the un the I'm fine. I know you and I have kind of traversed this a little bit because I am just fine. And but I think that through the time of us growing together, you notice when my fine is like, yeah, I don't care, versus uh, nope, there's something else here. And so I think it's that that care and that like the presence. Um yeah, the the presence to to take the time to care enough to lean in and ask questions um to get me thinking even like um, you know, it's interesting that you say this this way because when you said it, this is what came up for me. And it's like a it's not challenging me, but it's like I call them care frontations. You're like confronting me in like a very loving and and caring way because you care deeply about me and you genuinely want to know what I'm navigating. Um yeah, that's really important for me as I'm you know diving into some of these friendships now that I'm building. Because I've noticed for a while, and I think this is on part my partially my own doing, but this sense of like the people in my life, they they've got so much going on, they don't even have the space to carry what I have, you know. So it was a lot of like jumping on me all of the time. And not to say I don't want my friends to to give me all of the things that they're navigating, but felt like it was um, it was unequal in that there was never like a a real checking in with me. It was like a this is everything that I'm going through and this is awful, and blah blah blah. And it put me in this space of feeling like where do I fit in this? Even if I am having a hard day, gosh, they're having all this going on. Like, do they even have the space to hold me in what I'm going through?

SPEAKER_01

Um yeah, yeah. Different people have different capacities for that sort of thing. But what it brings up is people are only ever going to be willing to meet you as vulnerably as they are meeting themselves, right? So if you have somebody who lives on that surface level of like, I'm fine, it's fine, everything's fine, and they're not really sharing with you, they actually may not have the capacity to hold you to go a level two. Deeper than that. And it's not to say that's right or wrong or good or bad. It's not part of my value system inside of friendship. So a person like that, I'm not going to feel myself being able to get extremely close to, right? Because I value that depth in friendship where I can come to you when shit is hitting the fan in my life and I feel like I'm out of control and I need a prayer or a word or something over me. Or I'm just like, hey, I just need an ear. I don't even need any feedback. I just need to be able to unload this. But another piece that comes up when you were talking about when people were coming, like coming to you with all of their things and how that can create this, like, oh, they're holding all of this, which means they can't hold me. But if we have to be willing inside of friendship to assume that people don't know what we need, right? So how many times do I reach out to you and I'm like, hey, I need space held? Can you? I don't wait for you to say, like, hey, how are you for me to bring you my stuff? I will just openly and vulnerably bring you my stuff and ask if you have the capacity or the space for me to talk to you about this thing. And I think sometimes we forget about that, especially when friendships are newer. We forget that it is safe and okay to tell people how you need them to treat you, right? To say, like, hey, it's really important to me that you reach out and ask how I am, that it's not always me asking you how you are, right? Like I have a really hard time opening up if I don't first get asked like how I am or what's going on in my life. It creates this idea for me that you don't have the space for me to talk to you about me. Like those sort of things that I think in our society and maybe growing up felt like, ew, I'm not gonna do that. Like I'm not gonna be vulnerable, right? Is something I value so much in friendships these days because if I can't be a hundred percent of who I am and I can't come to you honestly and authentically and vulnerably, I'm gonna learn pretty quickly, like, hey, like maybe this is just a circumstantial or like acquaintance versus a friendship.

SPEAKER_03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04

I appreciate your naming that. And so I think what came up for me there was like, yeah, the people who are solid, godly friends to me also are going to point out truths to me, right? Even when it makes me feel uncomfortable, right? So even when you kind of lovingly give me that kind of feedback, like, yeah, that's right. It's uncomfortable for me to have to name those things. And I have to also be able to sit and recognize that if I'm not showing up and allowing myself to fully be seen, like then the person I'm trying to interact with, they don't really know me. And it's so it's then it's not it's not fair to them, and it's not fair to me because I'm not allowing them to fully experience who Jen is as a whole, like all of her, you know, stowns and crazy and silly and serious and emotional and sensitive and all of those things, like they're not getting the the chance to witness that. It's almost like the like a dishonest partnership, you know.

SPEAKER_01

And then we we can perpetuate that story in our our heads of like nobody sees me, nobody cares. I'm the one who holds it all, and nobody ever holds it for me. And it's like, well, have you tried asking somebody if they would be open to you holding, right? And I know I think another really beautiful piece about friendship though is like learning those things about one another. Like I am an open book, I'm an oversharer. Like, I will tell any Joe Schmo down on the corner about every last thing that's happening in my life, right? Whether they care to hear about it or not. Um, and and I think actually now that we're talking about this, like I think that that comes from my background of growing up and being surrounded by a rooted kind of rooted friendships, right? Like that I I've named my experience inside of friendship has been a blessing. It's been something that's been really beautiful in my life. I haven't had a lot of difficulty in that area. So it makes sense that I would have this experience where I feel really open and vulnerable and easy to share with people. And then someone like you, another aspect is like being the one to take the, I love what you said, care frontation role. And when you're feeling something of like, okay, you just said you were fine, but like that's not feeling true to me. Or like, I'm hearing this, and I might be totally off base, like letting it be okay if you're totally wrong and it's just your own psychosis that's going crazy. But I wish you guys could see the behind the scenes of some of the conversations that Jen and I have, because it'll literally be like, I'm reading this text message from you, and this is what I'm getting. Like, is that true or I'm just crazy? And sometimes it's true, and sometimes it's just your own neurosis, but it's the vulnerability of being willing to have those confrontational moments inside of friendship that actually allows you to get to the depth of vulnerability where then you don't feel alone because you could be surrounded by a sea of people and feel so lonely if with every single one of those people you're wearing some level of a mask. And sometimes those friends, like to get to that place inside of friendship, it requires you to continuously be like, hey, take off your mask. Hey, hey, hey, you're wearing you're wearing your mask again. I can't see you. Can you let me see you? I want to see you. And instead of that being this like, oh, you're so confrontational or you're so pushy or you're so um you're you're challenging all the time, which it can feel that way to somebody who doesn't feel really comfortable inside of that. So it's knowing people's limits and obviously not crossing boundaries, but it also comes from such a loving place of like, I actually want to know you, I actually want to see you, but I can't unless you let me.

SPEAKER_04

That's been a beautiful dance for the two of us. You definitely press me in a loving way. But I mean, no, but as as you're talking, I just can I so many different conversations, right? Like when you're building a business with somebody who you've only met in person like twice, by the way, and you know, just leading into fully trusting that God's God's got it. Um, you know, like we're still it is like a courtship and still learning each other's works and what things mean and reading the meaning under the meaning. And you are very good at taking the time to like lovingly challenge me. And it's uncomfortable, like, but it's also raising me up, which I think is another element of like having godly friendships in your life, is like you're not allowing me to sit and stay small, you're not allowing me to continue to silence myself and what I have to say. You see, you see past the mask and you know deeper and like can see my heart of like there's something here, and it's like you're calling me up to use my voice to in a safe space. And it feels really oh, that's what I was wanting to name is that it's it's really important to have that person that you do feel really safe and like you can explore these edges of like I've never done that before, like having to say I'm not happy with something such an edge for me because I'm a people pleaser and I just want to be go with the flow. And so when you challenge me on some of those things, and I have to sit and be like, okay, it's time to use your voice here and be honest, and it's okay. And like the love that happens there and the dialogue and the growth that happens is so beautiful. Um, so I'm forever grateful for that. But I I do think that's an important piece of these of these godly friendships is people who can just see past the mask and continue to invite you up.

SPEAKER_01

I feel like that feels like a good place to maybe have like a a a number one, right? If you want to have godly friendships, you have to work past people pleasing, even to the people you love most. And that's not to be, again, confrontational or challenging all of the time, or to go into a place where like what I say goes and what I want is most important. Like, I'm not gonna like please anybody ever, right? It's finding this beautiful dance and balance where you're not just yesing the other person to death or being yesed to death by the other person, because again, it creates this place where you're not being true and you're not being authentic to one another. And it's important, I think somewhere along the lines, we have mistakenly, maybe in more worldly friendships, learned that to be agreeable is to be, is to be friendly, right? To be agreeable is to, that's how you make relationships work, is if you just always agree with one another, right? Um, but when you are operating in that way, again, it doesn't leave the space for there to be the depth that we truly desire to have as souls with one another. If you're just yesing to death or I'm just yesing to death, we're wearing this mask where we're not being true and authentic about how we really feel. And that's being willing to be confrontational sometimes, but it's not, I like, I love that word. I'm gonna keep using it, care frontational, because it's so different. It's not this like, hey, you're X, Y, and Z. Like, there's not this blaming stance. It's just this, like, hey, I'm feeling this thing underneath here. Can we talk about it for a minute? Versus when you feel that thing, you're like, I'm just not gonna bring it up. It's not a big deal. I don't care, it's fine, you know. And I know everybody listening can relate to that experience of like all of the excuses that come up that stand between you and that fear you have of actually being fully seen and how you really feel about something. And I think that that's a really important thing to put in your back pocket when you are on the road to maybe developing more godly friendships or seeking out new friendships if you're feeling like you don't have a whole lot of them is like, hey, how can I actually allow myself or um I don't want to like train myself, convince myself to be authentic from the beginning. Like, how can I pray to God to help me to release the masks or the fear or the walls that I have around my heart that says, if I don't just yes this person, or if I'm not just agreeable, or if I am truly myself, that then they're gonna leave, right? Because God forbid they do, let them. Right? If somebody doesn't like you for all of who you are, you have to be okay with that not being your person, that not being your next best friend, right? Because for you to just be agreeable and yes somebody to death so that you can form a bond with them, that's not actually gonna lead you to the friendship that you're actually craving. Like, yes, you might have one more person in your life that you can text and you can go out to dinner and you can do these social things with, but you're not, it's not actually gonna satiate that desire you truly have for the depth of friendship that we're talking about.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, because it's like rooted in dishonesty. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I'm sure we've all been there. Like how many times? I mean, for me, I think it was always more of an experience inside of romantic relationships where I would mask. I've always felt pretty comfortable in myself and friendships. I mean, we don't have to dial it all the way back to my deepest middle school trauma around friendship in this conversation. But for whatever reason, I don't know, I don't know what it is. I've always felt pretty confident in being all of who I am, but it's also led to needing to be okay with people not being totally okay with me as a person and not wanting to be my best friend, you know.

SPEAKER_04

When that sounds beautiful. I'm sad I didn't uh accept that I don't have that have that experience. Um work in progress, you know? I'm I am working on allowing that to allowing myself to be more open and vulnerable. Um I think for me it's like praying, like, and maybe anyone in the listening can relate. If you're going through like friendship hurts praying to God to also take that away, I think there's so much fear. The fear is not, oh, well, they like me. It's like um, am I setting myself up for disappointment again? Am I gonna show up? Am I gonna be this solid friend and they're going to betray me? Or, you know, they're going to turn their back on me. So, like, yeah, I think leaning into that dialogue with God as I'm going into some of these new places, and I am, I am desiring to have some more soul-based, real, true, authentic friendships in my life. And that being the first step. Because if I don't, if I can't get out of my own way and lay down some of these stories, they're just gonna, you know, they're continuing to perpetuate me staying in this like victim mindset of like, oh, nobody likes me here, everyone's gonna hurt me.

SPEAKER_02

It's hard to make friends, you know, all the stories that I'm I'm telling myself. A huge part of our mission is not just meeting online, but connecting with our community through in-person experiences. This is why we are so passionate about hosting women's faith-based retreats all over the world.

SPEAKER_01

Our next one is coming up this spring, March 23rd to the 29th in Uvita, Costa Rica. We'd love to invite you to join us for a week of chef-curated meals, faith-filled workshops, nervous system healing, and playful adventures, all while being held in an incredible villa overlooking the ocean. We only have a few spots left. So if you're interested, click the link in the show notes, check out all the details, try not to drool over the villa we've chosen, and then book a call to secure your spot today. I think it's so important for you to be able to name that hurt that you have had. And then another place that I think maybe like a number two here is if you want to have godly friendships, can you invite God into your process of forming those relationships? I know we talk about this a lot in all areas, but let this be something you pray about. Let it be okay that you have this desire on your heart and ask God for the guidance. Ask God to take that past hurt out of your heart, to renew the ways your mind maybe sees friendship or fears friendship because of those past circumstances and trust in his provision and ability to guide you into the situations and relationships that are actually going to be more godly, more connected, more deep, right? And trust his guidance inside of that versus like, what do I have to do to fix this thing inside of me? Or where do I have to go, or what do I have to figure out so that I can have these types of friendships that I desire? Can we actually lean back, pray, and let him be the thing that leads that healing that has to happen, that then guides us into the a different experience of relationship and friendship?

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, I like that.

SPEAKER_04

I um you know what what I'm thinking about as I'm reflecting on some of my friendships as well is this idea that I think a godly friendship is going to be rooted in like a sense of mutual encouragement. I think that um to me, what I desire is that my friendships feel like a breath of fresh air. You know what I mean? Like people who are checking in and shooting you at text, like how can I pray for you? What's going on for you, right? Like when I'm with you, do I feel lighthearted and uplifted, or does it feel super draining and always like heavy? You know? Yeah. Is there gossiping happening happening, or are we pouring into one another about what our visions are for our future and what we're creating? And is this person like being a mirror to me when I'm like forgetting, you know? I think I just want to name, I think you're really great at that, Molly. Honestly, like every time I find myself like getting wrapped up in my self-doubt and confusion, you always pour life into me. And I think that's a beautiful quality of a God, uh, God, godly friendship. Somebody who's gonna remind you and constantly be here with this mirror. Like, hey, I know you're feeling like that right now, but this is this is who God says you are. This is how I see you. Like, we're not settling for those kinds of thoughts. That's of the enemy, right? Like, that's just something trying to stop you from being on this mission. And you do that so well and so beautifully. And I think to me, that's like that's an important quality of like a godlike friendship as well. Somebody who is like, when I leave your presence, I always feel better. Thank you.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I think it's a a quality I deeply value is I never I'm not going to, I'm not gonna get in the trenches with you as far as like I'll get in the trenches with you when you're in your deep chip, right? But I'm not gonna stay there with you and I'm not gonna leave you there either. I'm not gonna get into the pool when you're complaining about X, Y, and Z in your life. I'm not gonna add to that by complaining about X, Y, and Z in my life. And how you named it, if you're in situations where there's gossiping gossiping going on. Nine times out of 10, if you are in a group of people that you are experiencing gossiping about someone else who isn't in the room, when you're not in the room, that's happening about you too, right? So, and it's not to say that you have to be perfect, especially as us gals, gals, yap, we love to shoot the shit and we will go there sometimes, right? But is there somebody in the room who's actually gonna be like, hey guys, like maybe, maybe that's not the best use of our time or how we should be talking about other people, right? And in that group of people, is it okay that that person called them up and out of that, right? Because that's what I want. I'm not gonna sit here and say that I'm perfect and that it never happens in my own life or in my own circles. But I feel so alivened and enlightened when somebody is like, hey, maybe maybe that's not the conversation we can be we should be having, or when I can be the person who can say that, right? Because the same way Jen knows this, I say one of my favorite lines is like when my friends are talking shit specifically about themselves, I will say, don't talk about my friend like that. Like Jen will be down on herself talking badly, whatever, about something that's happening in her life. And I will literally say to her face, don't talk about my friend that way. That's the same way that I want would want to be able to say, Don't talk about my friend that way to Jen if she was talking about somebody else who wasn't in the room, right? Which I mean, it doesn't happen inside of our friendship, but we know that this does happen inside of female friendships. So you know you are in a good group of people when you can call people up and out of those things that are sinful or that separate us from God or aren't coming from a loving heart. And they're actually grateful for you for having done it. And they're not like, oh, like, what do you think you're better than us? Right. Because I think that that's a thing that we begin to navigate when we're stepping towards God and we're renewing our hearts and we're renewing our minds. I remember for me specifically when I started leaning into sobriety and not using substances anymore, I would get this like, what do you think you're better than us? Or like, oh, you're holier than thou now, right? And that's fine for people to have those opinions, but you can't let those opinions that people are going to have about the way that you're wanting to move in the world now keep you stuck in those places of like, oh, maybe I shouldn't speak up about the gossip, or maybe I shouldn't name that. That's not a part of my value system anymore, because you never know when you're gonna be in a group of people that you actually naming your truth and speaking one of those things that no longer aligns with you anymore is gonna change another person that you're speaking to, right? Like those are all opportunities to help uplift people instead of staying down in the trenches of some of the less aligned ways that we can naturally act as human beings.

SPEAKER_04

As a total side note, isn't it so crazy that people get so mad at you when you stop drinking? Like, you know what I mean? Like you tell people, yeah, I stopped drinking, and it's like we're so mad and confused, like, and they're just like, Oh, okay, like life, you know, what what do you think you are? Blah blah blah. And it's like, dude, if I just was like, yeah, I just I stopped doing heroin, you wouldn't be like bummer, dude. Like, you're fucking why are we bothering, like concerning ourselves with people who um like so actually I I changed it so instead of saying like oh yeah, I stopped drinking, I just am saying, like, yeah, I don't drink. I'm not a drinker, yeah. Um, and it's gotten way less. But I remember when I I was on that journey, and I think because people knew me as the party girl, right? If you saw me, I was ripping shots of henny, I had a buck of water, I was like doing the thing. So I was like, I get it, but it's just like dang, like be happy for a person. I'm literally just suit choosing. I don't want to like put all this poison in my body every day. Like, I think it's it's twofold.

SPEAKER_01

I think it's one, people have a hard time with change and letting go of the version of you that they knew, right? There's like a grief there for sure. I think specifically when it comes to like partying and that sort of thing, is like if you used to be the life of the party and miss like I'm gonna buy everybody all the rounds of shots and everything, there's this like, oh, that friend that I had that fun friend I had, like she's she's dying. Like she's not here anymore. Like, yeah, there's this beautiful version of who you're becoming. But I think there's that people get attached to the version of you that they knew. So there's this like upset that happens when you decide to become something different. When people are like, Oh, you've changed so much. It's like, yeah, I have. Thank you, God. Thank goodness. Yeah, thank goodness. And then the other side of that, I think specifically when it comes to kind of partying and substances, I won't say it's every single person in the world, but I think most people are utilizing that as some level of coping mechanism, right? And when you're like, hey, I don't choose to do that anymore, it creates an opportunity for them to maybe look at their habit and relationship and they don't want to. So instead of doing that, it's this like, oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04

Like it's easier to easier to judge somebody else. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Having to look at where it's like not healthy.

SPEAKER_01

A compassionate heart for that, right? It's like this was going to be the next thing I was going to say that if you really want to truly find these deep, vulnerable, authentic, godly friendships, there has to be a willingness to let people be people and let them mess up and let them fall and let them fail and not make like not be judgmental of that when they do, right? It's like have the heart of Christ and be compassionate in all situations. This doesn't mean that you have to love every single person that you meet and want to be everybody's best friend and want to spend all your time with every single person, but can you allow yourself to come to every human being with a sense of compassion and meet them where they are at versus what you think they should be doing or being in in their lives? Right. And I think that that'll help you, yeah, be able to discern between like, is this a person that I do want to invest my time and my energy into? Or is this, whether it be an old friend or somebody you're just meeting for the first time, maybe somebody who's just not for me anymore in this season of life that I'm moving into. And can that be okay? Like another piece of this is really working on our attachment to people. And uh, and like when you are walking with God, God is going to move you through experiences where he removes people from your life that are either no longer for you or maybe never were for you, or were only there because of a certain wounding or sin or whatever it is that you were partaking in. Like I know we keep talking about partying because we both had that experience in our past, but really allowing yourself to move through those grief periods when God does remove people from your life and letting it be okay to let yourself feel those difficult emotions of like, yeah, maybe me and this person aren't that well suited to be friends anymore because I am evolving and changing and our values don't align anymore. And can I allow that to be okay without judging myself or judging that other person, right? Having that compassionate heart of Christ to be able to let go um gracefully instead of it having to be that like now they're wrong and bad because they're not following in the footsteps that you're following in, or you're wrong and bad because you've decided to change your values and how you're moving in the world.

SPEAKER_03

That's really good.

SPEAKER_04

That's a that's a that's a work for me. I'm reflecting on a particular um friendship that I had to release probably about four or five months ago. And it's a daily not daily, not so much. Um but it is like a I have to keep revisiting it because there are moments where I don't there's an elements of me that want to reach out, that want to say something. Um there's fear connected to that. There's also a little like pettiness that comes up still when I'm seeing. So it's like I know stuff, God is still working on me. So I appreciate you naming naming that of doing it with grace because, like we said at the very beginning, you know, friendships, some of these friendships are here for a season. Maybe they're to, you know, grow us in a certain area to teach something, to point something out in us that we need to work on. Um and they're not always they're not going to be our forever friends. Um, and so being able to bow out from that gracefully and just, you know, have a differing of opinions or experience and that be okay and not continue to harbor this like anger or um, you know, trying to think of another emotion I'm harboring in that situation. Yeah, like resentment. There's underneath of that peeling away the layers, just like this deep level of hurt, um, and feeling again, not fully seen, like when people share certain things about you that you don't believe to be true, and you've been in other partnerships with people and that has not been their truth. You're just like, ow, you just really wanted to hurt me with that. And how do you reconcile that in your system? Um, so yeah, I I appreciate you naming that. And I am working on that in this particular friendship that has um needed to be dissolved a few months ago.

SPEAKER_01

I think that's a good area to kind of poke in and explore is how do you know? How do you know the difference between having a misunderstanding that's meant to be worked through for the evolution of a friendship and when it's time to let go, or when God is maybe removing a person from your life? How do you know the difference? What are some of the experiences maybe of knowing that it's time to cut ties with a person? Because that's a really it's a hard thing to do. We grow attachments to people very easily and our and our memories and our expectations, or um maybe even like things that we thought would evolve through the friendship. And so it's not an easy thing to j to just decide like, hey, this is this isn't actually for me anymore. And I think it can be a hard thing to let go of. So yeah, I'm curious for you. How did you maybe know inside of that friendship that it was time to let go there?

SPEAKER_05

Uh kind of how I named a little bit earlier.

SPEAKER_04

I think we obviously we had a falling out that kind of brought everything to a head. Um, but as I sat and reflected back over the timeline, it was again reassessing like I hate to say like when I say how did this friendship benefit me, I don't mean I just mean like, did I see myself growing as a human in this friendship? Right? Like, did I feel this person calling me up into my greatness? Was I inspired by them? Right? Those are all really important things for me that I'm navigating now as I lean into friendships. I don't want to be in friendships and close communications with people who are always gossiping, always being negative, um, always complaining, you know. Like I want to be surrounded by people who are praying for people who are have these big dreams and visions that are pouring into me, but they're also pouring into people around them. Um, so for me, I was just, I had to take a lens and look over the time of this friendship and really not feeling super supported and like I poured value because it sounds like I'm saying I don't value the person or they didn't bring value to me, but you know what I'm trying to say here is making sense to you.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, it's a mutual reciprocity, right? Like, do I feel like I'm being poured into and filled up as much as I am pouring and filling? Or it can also be this can show up and it can be hard for us to admit, right? Do I have the desire to pour into this person? Right? Because it can be a no and that can be okay, and that's a good sign that that person is not necessarily meant for you. And I don't mean that from a selfish lens of like it. I almost want to say this like when you know, you know. When something clicks and you're like, I want to be reaching out to this person, I want to be uplifting this person, I want to be supporting this person. And it doesn't feel like this constant draining of your energy, that there's this mutual reciprocity that you want to reach out, not because they're reaching out to you, but because there's, I don't know how to explain it, it's this unseen thing, this just like knowing there's this connection that you are both equally reaching out and pouring in. Maybe not in all moments, right? Because that's not how relationships work. There are definitely times inside of our friendship where maybe there's like a 60-40 situation or a 70-30, right? When one person just has more to give. Um, but across the span and the timeline of the friendship, does it feel like there is mutual respect and mutual reciprocity? And if that's not there, and you're not feeling that urge to want to be involved in that person's life, and you're not feeling that same desire for them to be involved in your life in a way that is uplifting, like maybe that's a sign that it doesn't have to be that this person's a bad person or they're wrong, or that there has to be some sort of big, huge blow up. I know in your situation there was actually a rift inside of that experience, and those things can happen, but it can sometimes just be this internal realization that I'm not for this person and this person isn't for me. And maybe it's time to move on from this friendship. I think sometimes inside of our society, we expect the same thing with romantic relationships, that there has to be this like big, bad, something wrong, explosive experience. And that's the only way that things can come to an end. But sometimes it can just be this internal knowing and decision of like, hey, I actually only have so much energy to pour, and this friendship isn't mutually beneficial in the way that I desire to have my friendships be in my life. And can that be enough and okay for me to pray over it and send that person on their way and not feel this incessant attachment to almost need to like prove ourselves or fix it or make it different than what it is in some way?

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, 100%. And I think it's important to be super in tune to your system as well, right? Like if every time you're talking to someone or like taking note, how does my body respond? Like, I know I got to a point where whenever I saw this person call my phone, like my body was like, uh, what now? You know, because it was just always like uh I had learned that whenever I got the phone call, it was going to be to like jump and and uh throw all these things and so also just paying attention to how your body is reacting when you're having these interactions with someone, I think is really important. Um what I'm hearing from all of this is that godly friendships need to be rooted in intentionality. Yeah, intentionality is the word that's just keeps coming up in my system again and again and again. It requires us to be vulnerable, it requires us to be honest, it requires us to step into it, right? Like friendships take work, they shouldn't feel hard and heavy, but you also have to make the time if it's important to you to check in with people, right? To make the time in your schedule actually go and have coffee, or like for us, meeting on a Zoom and being like, Hey, we're not gonna work, like let's just grab coffee and just like come on, you know. Um and that can be so scary as somebody who what I just named when I started this, you know, this conversation with you guys about how terrified I am about being, you know, having friendships. And I think a lot of women can resonate with that. Like we crave this kind of connection, but we're terrified of it. So meeting, you know, really going into it with like rooted in intentionality. How intentional can I be in the building of this relationship? Absolutely.

SPEAKER_01

And knowing the role that you play and the wounds maybe that you bring to the table, right? Because it can be so easy for us to get caught in the projection of our own wounds versus coming to a new relationship or a new experience with fresh eyes. Um, and I think one of the pla that's one of the places, again, that we can call God in. Like if you are going for a new experience or you're gonna meet up with a new friend or you're going to some sort of new women's group or something like that, can you pray for God to be on your mind and be on your heart and open you up to new experience and allow that experience to be new rather than bringing all of your baggage to the table all of the time? It's not that we can control do like always doing that, right? We can't always control the way that we're going to feel inside of certain social circumstances because of our past pains, but can we invite God into that space and can we be willing to own that in friendship, right? Like I know you and I have had so many conversations about like, hey, yeah, this thing has happened to me before in a relationship. And I'm recognizing like that's what's coming up for me now as we're having this conversation. And it's another piece of how willing are you to be vulnerable, to be authentic, to name those triggers and things that have happened to you when they come up and be willing to give the person on the other side of the relationship, on the other side of the friendship, the opportunity to meet you there and mend that inside of you by meeting you and loving you and caring for you in that space versus feeling like you have to mask or hide or manipulate in some way so that that circumstance doesn't happen again, right? I say all the time that relational wounds are only healed in relationship. The only way that we can heal this stuff that we're talking about inside of friendship is by being willing to be vulnerable and be afraid and be a little uncertain as we're navigating into new relationships and allowing the new experiences to actually heal what happened in the past. We can't heal relational wounds just in our minds or in somatic experiences or in therapy alone. We have to create fresh new experiences and we have to be willing to come to those experiences fresh and new in order to create them.

SPEAKER_04

Yeah, and I think that sometimes the friendships that we're praying for, they actually begin with us being brave enough to take the first step. Like you're sharing, like you're saying. We have to be brave enough to put ourselves out there to allow ourselves that we may get hurt again, right? Same thing we do in you know romantic partnerships. But being if you if you're really calling in solid, godly friendships, you have to put yourself out there, you have to have the courage, you have to, you know, pray for the courage to allow yourself to be fully seen.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_04

And see what happens.

SPEAKER_01

I think I just have like one final story because I know as you were going through that friendship experience, I was having one of my own with a very long-term friend of mine. And I think this is important to navigate as well. I know one of the points we made was like letting humans be humans and letting humans make mistakes and allowing yourself to give yourself that grace too, to having made mistakes inside of friendship. So, similarly, alongside this timeline where Jen was going through this piece with her friend, I was going through something with one of my oldest, dearest friends. And it was, it was this feeling of like, hey, are we gonna really like put this thing down? And it was heartbreaking. It felt like a like a breaking up of sorts, and there was a bit of separation and a bit of space. But something that kept landing on my heart is like, is this a person that I'm actually willing to let go of? Right. And I think that's a really important piece inside of godly friendships is setting down our own pride when things have gone wrong or things have gone awry or we feel hurt in some way, or the other person feels hurt in some way, and actually asking ourselves, like, is this something that I am willing to let go of? Is this some like what what is the depth and meaning of this relationship to me? And is this actually something that I can kind of face and confront and navigate in a way that might make us both uncomfortable, but could result in an evolution of that friendship, right? And I think sometimes, like I named, I have quite a bit of experience in really long-term friendships. Like my dearest friend have been friends with her since we're three years old, and I am 34 years old. Yeah. And most of my other friendships, it's like 10, 15, 20 years. And inside of the deepest, most nourishing friendships, there have been multiple points, same way as inside of my marriage, where we've been like, I don't know if we're gonna make it. And it's being willing to face those moments, right, together and choose like, hey, actually, this is too important to me. Can we face this together and take a look at how we can become better for each other so that we can continue moving forward? And now that's not the case for every single friendship, right? It's like giving you every scenario here of what are some of the signs and symptoms of when it might just be time to let go of a person. And how much can you allow God to be on your heart and in your heart? And can you allow his guidance when you pray over certain things be the thing that actually guides you forward? Because particularly inside of this friendship, we weren't, we hadn't spoken in a bit of time, but it kept coming up for me and it kept hurting and I kept praying over it. And I heard God say to me, like, you have to be honest and authentic here. What is it that you actually desire to do? And I realized that I wasn't reaching out because I didn't want to bother her. I thought that like she was done with me, you know. I thought that we had just like the chips had fallen where they may, but I knew that my deepest, truest authenticity would be to reach out at least one more time and say, like, hey, here's all my cards on the table. This is how I completely feel about this thing, and if there's any way that we can move forward. And it was in that scenario, because God guided me through prayer, to be honest, to put down my pride, to allow myself to do the uncomfortable thing that was actually the authentic thing, that we not only saved a beautiful long-term friendship, but we allowed it to evolve to an even better place than it was prior to that experience, right? So again, it's that willingness to consistently be authentic and intentional and vulnerable and not from a place of pride or proving, but from a place of really deep-seated care and love for walking through life with people, you know, all of life with people, and knowing that when you choose to do that inside of friendship, there's gonna be more we're human beings. There's gonna be moments where we let each other down, there's gonna be moments where we annoy each other, there's gonna be moments where we have frustrations and things like that, just the same as in partnership. And what I'm recognizing through this whole conversation is almost if we are wanting these lifelong, deep, godly friendships, can we begin putting as much effort and emphasis and love and intention into them as we do our relationships, our romantic relationships and our marriages, right? And I know that inside of the Christian faith, your marriage is like that's your one, like that's that's above everything. And I do agree with that. But can what would it look like for you to have those two, three, four, five friends that you also put that much intention, effort, and vulnerability into those relationships, right? What would that look like? How would that evolve for you inside of those spaces instead of how we named earlier this feeling that inside of friendship, for whatever reason, we have to keep certain masks or vulnerabilities in place.

SPEAKER_05

Yeah, I guess so.

SPEAKER_04

Maybe some questions if you're listening in and you're kind of getting curious to even ask yourself, because you know, this first of all, I'm gonna make a statement that I don't like. Um I have heard named that like the the kind of people or you know, friendships or partner put it in there that you attract tend to be the kind of person you are. So like the friendships you attract tend to be the kind of friend you are, which I don't like because then I'm like, oh, does that mean I'm not a good friend? But questions to be asking yourself, right? Like, what am I praying for for my friends? Do I encourage them in their faith? Am I reaching out to them and uplifting them when they are struggling? Am I celebrating them when I'm seeing them in their growth? Right. Like starting to just do a little self-assessment here of like what's on your side of the street, you know, how can I show up as my very best version here to call in the type of friendships that I'm desiring in my life and maybe just kind of you know, sitting with that. And then my my second just for funzie invitation is like, do you have if you have people in your life that are drawing you closer to God and they do feel like really soulful friendships, like can you pick up your phone and like shoot them a text today? Yeah, and let them know. Let them know that you love them, let them know that you're grateful for you know how they show up in your life. Just to nurture that relationship a little bit more.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, absolutely. I think that's like a tangible implementation is can you reach out to the people you care about? That's another thing. I mean, I I'm recognizing through this conversation that I really, really value friendship deeply. And I think that's why that's something that you're able to reflect back to me. And I am the type of friend who will just randomly on a Tuesday, it's not because I want to spark a conversation or because I need anything from you, just reach out and say, like, hey, this song just came on and I'm thinking about you, remember X, Y, and Z. Like if I get sparked a memory of you and it puts a smile on my face, I'm reaching out to you to tell you, like, I just had that moment with you, even though you're not here with me right now. Right. And like it can be those tiny little things, those tiny little efforts that we're putting in on a day-to-day basis. This doesn't mean you have to be in constant contact. We're adults and we have a lot on our plates and a lot going on. And friendship often doesn't look the same way it did in our teens and our 20s. It can be that you go weeks or even months without connecting and seeing each other, but can you keep that connection alive by being willing to be that one who reaches out and is consistently telling? People in their life, like what they mean to them, right? I think that's a really easy implementable thing that you can literally go and do right now is remind all of your friends that you have in your life how much they mean to you, right? And if you're somebody who is struggling or feeling like you just don't have that in your life right now, can you turn to God and begin to pray and be honest about the desire that you have to have those kinds of connections and communications in in your life? Because it's it's such an important and nourishing piece of this human experience. No, it's okay.

SPEAKER_04

I was gonna also offer a shameless plug to joining our community. It's true, right? Our living liberated community is exactly that. It's a group of women coming together and we're trying to, you know, we're doing life together, we're doing faith together, we're talking business things together, we're doing all of that. So also, if you're kind of trying to find your footing and you're looking for something that's like, you know, okay, maybe I want to just see what this could feel like, you know, join our free community. We meet in there multiple times throughout the month, uh, where we're, you know, having community, having connection, sharing a cup of coffee, talking about what's going on in our life. And it's a it's a space, a safe space. At least I feel it's a safe space, and we've really have poured into making that feel like a space where people can land. Um, for you to start trying some of this vulnerability on for allowing yourself to fully be seen. Um, so check that out. Well, that will be in the show notes for sure if you want to join our community and uh start pouring into some friendships.

SPEAKER_01

I'm having a whole epiphany right now, but I'm like, I didn't you know what that wasn't top of mind intention when we created that community, but it's literally what it's for. It's literally a space to find godly friendships with other women. Like that's what we're cultivating in there. Like, yes, we're talking about God and we're studying the Bible and we're we're doing all these other things, but the entire point we we literally use the tagline like to do all of life together. Yes, we're walking in God, and yes, we're trying to uplift one another, but what it it literally is a space to create godly friendships and to connect with other women. And I will just name if you do decide to join, it is a free space. And because it's a free space, sometimes it can be a little bit hard to get your butt on those calls. But the more that you again let this be an invitation for intentionality. Hey, I'm really seeking for some of these godly friendships and I want to be really connected to women in this way. So can you be really intentional about showing up and being a part of the conversation and connecting and consistently coming eye to eye, face to face with the women inside of this space to cultivate that community, right? Because it only the community only gets cultivated as much as the community shows up to cultivate, right? It takes every single person who's a part of that space to pour in for the connections to be made. And um I think sometimes it can be so easy to join an online space and kind of be this like fly on the wall or forget and let it be on the back burner. But if you really set that intention, like, hey, I'm really gonna show up wholeheartedly to this thing and I'm gonna meet with this, these women once a week, twice a week. Sometimes we have even up to three times a week, like you never actually know what God has in store for you inside of a space like that. So thank you so much for bringing that up. I wasn't even thinking about that, but I'm like really wow. We created literally a community, a community to find your friends. So come be friends with us.

SPEAKER_04

We we did that. It's like the bum, it's like the bumble for girls. Is that even a name of anyway?

SPEAKER_01

Let's talk for another time. And that was gonna be the other piece. I don't know if this was gonna be too far, but it's just the kind of person that I am. Like, if you need friends, I love friends. Like the way that I operate in being somebody on social media, yes, I am a business person and there's things that I'm offering, but truly I care so much. And Jen knows this, like, we became friends because she was one of my clients. Like, once I am connected to somebody in that way, and I don't know Jen feels the same way, like we are so here to be your friend and to love you and to uplift you and to connect you to other women who are who are doing the same. How Jen said, you attract friendships and people who are similar to how you are, that's what we're attracting into this community. Women who are open and vulnerable and so deeply desiring to do life together, and so deeply desiring to do life in God and letting it be messy and not being perfect about it. So, if any of that calls to you, like thank you so much for being here and listening to this podcast, but also come join us off the air and at up to your AirPods and like in community and in person.

SPEAKER_04

100%. So good. Well, thank you guys for tuning in with us today. Let us know your thoughts, what you're thinking about godly friendships, you know, anything that felt resonant from what we shared, or really anything, anything that's on your heart, drop it here. We'd love to know. We'd love to love on you and support you. And until next time, you know what I'm gonna say. Don't forget it. God got it. Let's go. Okay, guys, that's a wrap. If today's episode spoke to you, please let us know. Leave us a comment or reach out via email.

SPEAKER_02

If you know someone who would benefit from this message, please take a moment to share it with them and make sure to hit the subscribe so that you never miss an episode.

SPEAKER_04

Thanks for spending time with us today. We hope you leave your reminder that whatever season you're in right now, God's got it.